Jul 032012

This is me and the love of my life captured gaming a few years ago. We have since upgraded to Turtle Beach headsets so we can hear the bullying loud and clear. In 3D, surround sound. In space. No, not really.

Wow…really, Twitterverse? REALLY?!!

You know, I am so glad I saw the tweet from @MsFuckingMetal bringing to our attention that the title of this blog was a trending topic on Twitter today. I am glad because, as a girl gamer, I have faced my share of adversity in the 3+ years I have committed to a xBox LIVE membership. I have no doubts many of you have experienced the same, which compelled me to want to talk about this stereotype, the treatment of female gamers by many (stupid) male gamers, and other unnecessary bullying going on in the live gaming experience.

First of all, who in the hell thought it amusing or appropriate to start and intentionally perpetuate this stereotype that we female gamers cannot, in fact, game? Seriously? If you come around speakin’ that kind of vernacular to us, be prepared for a verbal (and possibly physical) spanking. Nuff said. If you really believe this preposterous accusation, you have got to be living under a rock. You are also severely unsocialized.

When I initially joined xBox LIVE, my game of choice was Left 4 Dead. It was, and still is, quite popular among gamers, especially since it is a multi-player game. I found myself really discouraged, angry, frustrated, and impatient at the number of times I was instantly kicked out of lobbies. Most of you can identify with that, I am sure. If you cannot, imagine you have a game that you really, REALLY love to play with other people, and you are constantly being kicked out of the lobby. As a result, the time you invested in playing has been cut short and ruined because people have the option to kick you out, and you find it happens repeatedly. It is not fun by any means. For me, it got to the point where I was just hoping the game would start so that I could get some play time in, but a vote to kick me would always appear sooner or later. The reality of it was that I was really damn good at the game, just nobody wanted to give me a chance. I learned not to talk on the mic at all and just hope that my gamer tag went unnoticed just so I could play. It was really demeaning. Occasionally, I would get the jerk who felt compelled to take it to the next level by calling me out and antagonizing me in the lobbies. Those were real winners, let me tell you. Thanks, guys. You really showed me how awesome you were by how low you could cut me down verbally.

The last point I want to hit on here is in regards to the verbal bullying that goes on in the lobbies, in game chat, and through messages. Now that I have been gaming for awhile and have a wonderful group of gamers I hang with nightly, I don’t often experience this type of bullying. However, what really gets my goat more than anything is when a bully targets my boyfriend or friends in a lobby for no reason. These people must have a lot of spare time where they perfect how to bully people and try to humiliate them with some really offensive name-calling. They do this even when young kids are in the lobby! That is a topic for a later blog, by the way. Regardless, the bullying I have witnessed in games is horrible. Just horrible. It is unnecessary, childish, offensive, you name it. Some are used to it, but I still am shocked at the things I will occasionally hear. I have since learned to mute others and the team I am playing against, but it sometimes is not enough.

I would like to learn about your experiences, so please comment. Share your stories about this mundane stereotype against female gamers, bullying experiences over live gaming, anything related to this topic. Thanks, y’all.


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  2 Responses to “#GirlsAreBadAtGaming via Twitter”

  1. IronKnuckle

    Cyber bullying is definately a major issue when it comes to online multiplayer, and I am really glad to hear this topic being brought up and analysed more so that we can learn from it. Very good article!

    • KarmaVixen

      Thank you for your feedback. The night I wrote this article, I was in a lobby for Left 4 Dead 2. Another gamer in the lobby immediately targeted me upon hearing me speak, and he was saying some seriously offensive things to me. When my boyfriend spoke up, he began taunting him as well. It was truly repulsive. I seriously wonder what is wrong with people sometimes…